The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly (Post #21)
Yesterday was my first oncology appointment at the Cross. I brought snacks, but didn't have time to eat them, despite the appointment taking almost 3 hours! The afternoon didn't get off to the best of starts, as hubby was a little tardy in leaving the house. Marigan and I may have been sitting, waiting rather impatiently, in the vehicle, but we did not honk! 🥇 Unfortunately, we arrived a bit late, and as I had forgotten to research available parking, parked at the Kaye Clinic, which is more than a pleasant walk away. I may have even been a bit short-tempered and muttered a little under my breath (okay, it may have been a lot), but it seriously might have been faster to call an Uber, rather than walk from where we parked! It was all fine in the end, however, I even had time to change into an oversized gown and housecoat, (which added at least 3 pounds to my weigh-in) and fill out the requisite forms before seeing the oncologist.
We spent the next 2+ hours in a tiny examining room (though the actual exam took 3 minutes), while different professionals came through, each with a different role. The first person we saw was Tony, a wonderful nurse who took my health history. I was a little worried that her eyes were going to fall out by the time I completed my narrative. Apparently, my journey has been a bit more exciting than most! 🤷🏼♀️ Once she had completed her tasks, we met the oncologist, Dr. Zhu. I know, I know, I said I was seeing Dr. Smiley, but we were given incorrect information - Dr. Smiley's a melanoma doctor, which I also have, but doesn't require active treatment at this time. Besides, I'm thinking that Dr. Zhu, (pronounced "zoo") might be even more appropriate than Dr. Smiley. Things have been rather wild. 😊 After our time with Dr. Zhu, we met with a pharmacist who went over all my prescriptions and supplements to ensure there are no interactions. You certainly feel very well cared for as a Cross patient!
So first the good news:
- My chemo protocol is not the worst one available. 😊 I realize that sounds rather Pollyanna-ish, but as my tumor grade is 3 (highest level), I was a bit concerned that I would require a dose-dense regimen with many different chemo drugs. Thankfully that is not so. The name of my protocol is TCH, which stands for Taxotere (Docetaxel), Carboplatin (Paraplatin or CBDCA), and Herceptin (Trastuzumab). I will receive 6 doses of the first 2 medications, and 17 of the second. These are administered every three weeks, beginning Monday, the 22nd!
- The drugs can be administered via IV! I'm super pleased about this, as the thought of having a port inserted wasn't very palatable, given my history. I'm pretty sure that at this point, no one wants to cut into me any more than absolutely necessary! 🔪🩸
- If all goes well, I will be finished with the nasty part of chemo by Christmas, then receive only the Herceptin infusions, which will continue for a total of 51 weeks. I will also begin radiation treatments once I'm only receiving Herceptin.
- Treatments and testing have improved so much over the past several decades! They would not have caught the micrometastases in my lymph nodes and I would also not have received Herceptin, a targeted therapy that improves my odds of survival from <50% to much higher.
- The fact that they removed 7 tumors is less of a concern than the size of the biggest one when determining treatment. So, despite my entire "tumor field" being rather large, my biggest tumor was only 2.3cm, which is considered small.
- My cancer is "spontaneous" in nature, meaning that there is likely no hereditary component to it, though I still plan to have genetic testing. I've also probably only had it for less than a year, which makes me feel better about missing out on mammograms since they only caught the biggest tumor in the first mammogram.
Now for the bad part of the news:
- There are no guarantees that the treatment will work. My prognosis is very good, with 95% and 87% survival rates, at 5 and 10 years post-surgery, respectively. And you can be sure that I will be fighting this with all that I am. I have future grandbabies to spoil, after all! But one important factor that is a bit difficult to determine in terms of weighting when predicting my outcome, is the will of God in my life. If He wants me to live to 90, then no cancer will stand in His way. I have a decal on my "cancer information binder" that reads "My God is bigger than breast cancer." And I firmly believe that! My life is not determined by statistics, it's determined by my heavenly Father. My grandfather asked God for 15 more years and got it. I'm thinking I'd like another 40? 😬
So what about the ugly part of things?
- Well, that would be the side effects. I will lose my hair; this usually occurs within 2 weeks. (A bald head would have been more welcome during this extended heat wave! 😁) Hence, Karen cut my hair into a short and sassy style this afternoon, and once it starts to seriously fall out, I will have my head shaved, or do it myself. (I had no idea how dark my roots were, but I'm digging the new look. 👦🏻) No, I'm not looking forward to being bald, and yes, I have a glorious auburn wig ready to go! 👩🏼🦰
- I'm really hoping that I'll be boring and only experience the 2 most common side effects: hair loss and fatigue...oh, and nausea. I get nauseated from stress, migraines, and driving, so yeah...might not be able to dodge that one, but we can always hope! My oncologist was quick to remind us that he hasn't had a single patient suffer from all the side effects, then again, he'd never heard of anyone getting ARDS after a lumpectomy either! 😁
- Dr. Zhu was very adamant that I protect my health...so once again, I will be doing my best hermit impersonation. 🧙🏼♂️ (Something, something...cold and flu season...any fever over 38.3C means an immediate ER visit...😲) That's a disappointment, as I have only attended church twice since my ICU stay! Chemo does lower your immune system, however, and I really don't want to have to extend my treatment, due to missed doses caused by ill health. I want to "git 'er done!"
So that's the list. Not bad, when you consider that the only item in the bad section is controlled by God. 😊 Am I happy to be subjecting my body to chemo? Of course not. But God created me and I trust that He knows what He's doing, even in this. Trust. That's what it's all about. Is it easy to trust continuously, with nary a doubt or moment of grief? Of course not, I am human after all. 😏 But knowing that I can trust God gives me that inexplicable peace I've mentioned before, yes, even when facing chemo.
Lauren Daigle says it so well in "Trust In You."
I thought this video with the woman's glorious mane was appropriate. 😉
Comments
Post a Comment